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What It’s All About

Momservation: Listening to the constant bickering between my kids makes me regret all the time I spent teaching them how to talk.

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A momentary truce before the bickering continues

If it’s not about the remote then it’s about what to watch.

If it’s not about whose turn it is to set the table, then it’s about whose turn it is to clear it.

If it’s not about who has to get into the shower first, then it’s about who took too long.

If it’s not about downloaded aps then it’s about downloaded songs.

If it’s not about who gets to sit here, then it’s about who gets to sit there.

If it’s not about who walked the dog last, then it’s about who picks up the poop.

If it’s not about knock it off, then it’s about who started it.

If it’s not about that’s mine, then it’s about not yours.

If it’s not about who got more, then it’s about who got less.

If it’s not about who rides in the front seat, then it’s about who chooses the radio station.

If it’s not about stay out of my room, then it’s about stay out of my stuff.

If it’s not about he got to pick last time, then it’s about she got to pick last time.

If it’s not about that’s not fair, then it’s about you’re being mean.

If it’s not about who’s first, then it’s about who’s next.

If it’s not about why can’t I, then it’s about how come you get to?

If it’s not about don’t touch me, then it’s about don’t look at me.

If it’s not about give that back, then it’s about who took it.

If it’s not about he won’t let me play, then it’s about she always has to be included.

If it’s not about who was sitting there first, then it’s about who got up.

If it’s not about he won’t leave me alone, then it’s about she won’t quit bugging me.

If it’s about don’t do that, then it’s about stop it.

If it’s about who did it on purpose, then it’s about it was just an accident.

…And I’m just scratching the surface of all the things siblings bicker about. These are just the ones I came up with listening to my kids for the last five minutes.

While you think of your own kids’ versions of what it’s all about to add to the list, I will leave you with my current impersonation of my children:

“Really Whitney? Wooooow.”

“Why would you do that Logan?!”

Repeat every five minutes…

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