Momservation: Super Glue becomes a toddler mom’s best friend during the holidays.
Back by popular demand (or because I need to finish my Christmas shopping) are a few of my Mommy Modified Christmas Carols. Inspired nearly a decade ago by my two kids under two, these renditions of classic carols are sure to become the next Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer! Okay, maybe not, but it was either channel my frustration into song or tie everyone to a chair until New Years.
Enjoy and don’t forget to sing along:
A Very Toddler Christmas
(To the tune of Twelve Days of Christmas)
On the first day of Christ-mas, my tod-dler broke for me:
The car-rot nose off of Fros-ty.
On the se-cond day of Christ-mas, my tod-dler broke for me:
Two Christ-mas mugs and the car-rot nose off of Fros-ty.
On the third day of Christ-mas, my tod-dler broke for me:
Three wise men, two Christ-mas mugs, and the car-rot nose off of Fros-ty.
On the fourth day of Christ-mas, my tod-dler broke for me:
Four wrapped up presents, three wise men, two Christ-mas mugs, and the car-rot nose off of Fros-ty.
On the fifth day of Christ-mas, my tod-dler broke for me:
Five, an-gel wings! Four wrapped up presents, three wise men, two Christ-mas mugs, and the car-rot nose off of Fros-ty.
On the sixth day of Christ-mas my toddler broke for me:
Six cd’s play-ing, five, an-gel wings! Four wrapped up presents, three wise men, two Christ-mas mugs, and the car-rot nose off of Fros-ty.
On the seventh day of Christ-mas my toddler broke for me:
Seven globes a- snow-ing, six cd’s play-ing, five, an-gel wings! Four wrapped up presents, three wise men, two Christ-mas mugs, and the car-rot nose off of Fros-ty.
On the eighth day of Christ-mas my toddler broke for me:
Eight rein-deer pranc-ing, seven globes a- snow-ing, six cd’s play-ing, five, an-gel wings! Four wrapped up presents, three wise men, two Christ-mas mugs, and the car-rot nose off of Fros-ty.
On the ninth day of Christ-mas my toddler broke for me:
Nine trains de-railing, eight rein-deer pranc-ing, seven globes a- snow-ing, six cd’s play-ing, five, an-gel wings! Four wrapped up presents, three wise men, two Christ-mas mugs, and the car-rot nose off of Fros-ty.
On the tenth day of Christ-mas my toddler broke for me:
Ten carolers carol-ing, nine trains de-railing, eight rein-deer pranc-ing, seven globes a- snow-ing, six cd’s play-ing, five, an-gel wings! Four wrapped up presents, three wise men, two Christ-mas mugs, and the car-rot nose off of Fros-ty.
On the eleventh day of Christ-mas my toddler broke for me:
Eleven lights a- blink-ing, ten carolers carol-ing, nine trains de-railing, eight rein-deer pranc-ing, seven globes a- snow-ing, six cd’s play-ing, five, an-gel wings! Four wrapped up presents, three wise men, two Christ-mas mugs, and the car-rot nose off of Fros-ty.
On the twelfth day of Christ-mas my toddler broke for me:
Twelve heir-loom ornaments, eleven lights a- blink-ing, ten carolers carol-ing, nine trains de-railing, eight rein-deer pranc-ing, seven globes a- snow-ing, six cd’s play-ing, five, an-gel wings! Four wrapped up presents, three wise men, two Christ-mas mugs, and the car-rot nose off of Fros-ty.
Dress Up Baby Jesus
(To the tune of Away in a Manger)
- Where Ba-by Jesus, have you dis-a-ppeared?
The last time I look-ed you were right here;
Oh there you are Lord, in my tod-dler’s crib,
Dressed in pink ruf-fles, and sporting a bib.
2. Mis-sing again from your na-tiv-ity scene,
I’ve tried to explain what your holli-ness means,
But a two year old just doesn’t un-derstand,
Why a boa doesn’t work for the God of man.
3. Tied you Baby Je-sus into your creche,
Ex-plained to my tod-dler you needed your rest;
Fi-nally she left you, and just let you be,
But Mar-y and the farm animals are hav-ing tea.
God Rest Ye Weary Toddler Mom
(Tune of God Rest Ye Merry, Gentlemen)
- God rest ye wear-y todd-ler mom, It is the end of day,
For lit-tle ball of en-er-gy is finally put away;
To rest their tiny head for, tomorrow’s end-less play:
O pints of Ben and Jer-ry’s, Ben and Jer-ry’s, O pints of Ben and Jerry’s.
2. From God, our Heav-en-ly Fa-ther, A bless-ed ba-by came,
And un-to first-time par-ents brought rou-tines of the same;
How many times mo-re must we play that game?
O pints of Ben and Jer-ry’s, Ben and Jer-ry’s, O pints of Ben and Jerry’s.
3. The mom-my of a whirl-wind mov-ing all the time,
What next in their lit-tle mouth will Moth-er find?
Just one a-dult con-ver-sation before I lose my mind:
O pints of Ben and Jer-ry’s, Ben and Jer-ry’s, O pints of Ben and Jerry’s.
- Photo by Ron Silveira (thanks Granpa!)
