Hubby keeps asking me what I want for Mother’s Day.
I keep telling him nothing. My cup runneth over. I’m happy with school crafted tokens of affection from my children and the last card on the shelf from Hallmark.
I’m afraid to tell him what I really want.
Is it wrong to say, on Mother’s Day, the day children of all ages everywhere shower their mothers in love and appreciation, that I just want to be left alone?
? ? ?
I think what I want for Mother’s Day is not to be Mom. Just for one day.
I want to wake up in my own sweet time, on my own terms with no hubba-hubba honey nudging me and no sound of kids fighting over the remote. I want silence, emptiness, a void of a day with no agendas, no expectations, no family hovering over me desperately trying to make my day special.
How special it would be if they left. And took the dog that wants to be fed with them.
There’s nothing in particular I’d want to do, and that would be the beauty of it. Maybe read the paper in bed. Maybe go get my toes done. Maybe finally try that new midtown restaurant for lunch. Maybe do a little shopping (for me only). Maybe go see that sappy romantic comedy with a giant tub of popcorn and big box of Junior Mints all to myself. It would be a celebration of me not mommy.
Sometimes I fantasize about being a ME person. No one else to answer to. No one’s feelings to consider. No other person’s needs to attend to. Just me, myself and I to worry about.
But it’s hard to be a ME person when a WE is involved. And I kinda like those other little hanger-oners. They’re pretty darn cute. The big, tall, handsome catch all those years ago has still got it too.
I guess when I think about it, the reality is better than the fantasy.
And I know me. After a few hours of my off-duty mommy time, I’d become desperate to have my family around me, missing those sweet reminders of exactly why I chose to become a mommy in the first place.
In reality, the best Mother’s Day gifts were born in October of ’99 and April of ’01. I don’t need anything else.
Except maybe that six season collection of Sex and The City.