{"id":9827,"date":"2009-03-02T20:51:41","date_gmt":"2009-03-02T20:51:41","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/momservations.wordpress.com\/2009\/03\/02\/girl-scout-cookie-revenge"},"modified":"2009-03-02T20:51:41","modified_gmt":"2009-03-02T20:51:41","slug":"girl-scout-cookie-revenge","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/momservations.com\/index.php\/2009\/03\/02\/girl-scout-cookie-revenge\/","title":{"rendered":"Girl Scout Cookie Revenge"},"content":{"rendered":"<p class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin:0;\"><font face=\"Times New Roman\" size=\"4\">Here&rsquo;s my philosophy with Girl Scout cookies: If it&rsquo;s not there, you can&rsquo;t eat it. (Plus, then you don&rsquo;t have to run an extra twenty minutes to get them to let go of your thighs.)<\/font><\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin:0;\"><font face=\"Times New Roman\" size=\"4\">&nbsp;<\/font><\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin:0;\"><font face=\"Times New Roman\" size=\"4\">But the ghosts of Girl Scout cookies past haunt me every spring, making me fill the house with tangible, tasty&nbsp;reminders of those that have gone before them.<\/font><\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin:0;\"><font face=\"Times New Roman\" size=\"4\">&nbsp;<\/font><\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin:0;\"><font face=\"Times New Roman\" size=\"4\">Delightful Do-si-dos. Sweet little Samoas. Trusty Tagalongs. Lovely Lemonades. And of course, my dear friend bought by the case &ndash; Thin Mints.<\/font><\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin:0;\"><font face=\"Times New Roman\" size=\"4\">&nbsp;<\/font><\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin:0;\"><font face=\"Times New Roman\" size=\"4\">I like to think it&rsquo;s my philanthropic tendencies that get the best of me, unable to say &ldquo;no&rdquo; to an adorable little girl in uniform just doing her civic duty.<\/font><\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin:0;\"><font face=\"Times New Roman\" size=\"4\">&nbsp;<\/font><\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin:0;\"><font face=\"Times New Roman\" size=\"4\">But let&rsquo;s face it, I&rsquo;d probably buy them from a mangy, toothless crack addict selling them from the trunk of his car if it meant I would otherwise never see my precious Thin Mints again.<\/font><\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"text-align:center;margin:0;\" align=\"center\"><font face=\"Times New Roman\" size=\"4\">?<span>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; <\/span>?<span>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; <\/span>?<\/font><\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin:0;\"><font face=\"Times New Roman\" size=\"4\">&nbsp;<\/font><\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin:0;\"><font face=\"Times New Roman\" size=\"4\">There&rsquo;s a long running list of things I&rsquo;ll do for my kids. <\/font><\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin:0;\"><font face=\"Times New Roman\" size=\"4\">&nbsp;<\/font><\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin:0;\"><font face=\"Times New Roman\" size=\"4\">Things like volunteering in their classrooms and driving on field trips; Shuttling them to and from practices and camps that fill every season. Sitting through movie gems like Beverly Hills Chihuahua; Responding with a smile and clap of approval to endless calls of &ldquo;Watch this Mom!&rdquo; Rising from a deep sleep to accompany a frightened son to the bathroom at 2:30 in the morning; Taking a cold shower so my kids will have hot ones.<\/font><\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin:0;\"><font face=\"Times New Roman\" size=\"4\">&nbsp;<\/font><\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin:0;\"><font face=\"Times New Roman\" size=\"4\">But the call of Girl Scouts is something I just cannot do.<\/font><\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin:0;\"><font face=\"Times New Roman\" size=\"4\">&nbsp;<\/font><\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin:0;\"><font face=\"Times New Roman\" size=\"4\">I know, I know, it&rsquo;s a rewarding and positive experience for both daughter and mother. I don&rsquo;t knock the people who get enjoyment out of it. Great. Good for you. I get it.<\/font><\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin:0;\"><font face=\"Times New Roman\" size=\"4\">&nbsp;<\/font><\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin:0;\"><font face=\"Times New Roman\" size=\"4\">It&rsquo;s just not my thing. And I&rsquo;m relieved like a mother who hears that her buck-tooth kid isn&rsquo;t going to need braces after all that my daughter isn&rsquo;t into it either. I have small guilt (eating the last brownie type guilt &ndash; easy to live with), that back in kindergarten when Whitney wanted to try it, I nudged her in another direction and deftly dodged all the moms trying to peer pressure us into it. <\/font><\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin:0;\"><font face=\"Times New Roman\" size=\"4\">&nbsp;<\/font><\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin:0;\"><font face=\"Times New Roman\" size=\"4\">Why the GS aversion? Maybe it&rsquo;s because I don&rsquo;t do girlie. I didn&rsquo;t play with Barbies, I never wanted to play My Little Pony or Rainbow Bright, I wasn&rsquo;t a cheerleader, and I had no interest in growing up to marry anyone in Duran Duran. <\/font><\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin:0;\"><font face=\"Times New Roman\" size=\"4\">&nbsp;<\/font><\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin:0;\"><font face=\"Times New Roman\" size=\"4\">I was always too busy trying to keep up with my brother and embarrassing boys who thought their gender made them better than me. So, I guess my problem is after a lifetime of effort trying to blur the line between genders, the thought of serving my daughter up to a &ldquo;girls club&rdquo; rubs me the wrong way.<\/font><\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin:0;\"><font face=\"Times New Roman\" size=\"4\">&nbsp;<\/font><\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin:0;\"><font face=\"Times New Roman\" size=\"4\">Not that it&rsquo;s not a great experience for thousands of American girls. I don&rsquo;t begrudge any of them the enjoyment, camaraderie and leadership skills they develop. Yay, team.<\/font><\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin:0;\"><font face=\"Times New Roman\" size=\"4\">&nbsp;<\/font><\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin:0;\"><font face=\"Times New Roman\"><font size=\"4\">I just don&rsquo;t want to join it. I&rsquo;m pretty happy over here on the sidelines eating their cookies. Isn&rsquo;t it enough that my taste buds are their biggest cheerleaders with my expanding waistline the president of their booster club? <span>&nbsp;<\/span><\/font><\/font><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Here&rsquo;s my philosophy with Girl Scout cookies: If it&rsquo;s not there, you can&rsquo;t eat it. (Plus, then you don&rsquo;t have to run an extra twenty&hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-9827","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.3 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Girl Scout Cookie Revenge - Kelli M. Wheeler<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/momservations.com\/index.php\/2009\/03\/02\/girl-scout-cookie-revenge\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Girl Scout Cookie Revenge - Kelli M. 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