{"id":9361,"date":"2008-09-29T11:48:07","date_gmt":"2008-09-29T11:48:07","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/momservations.wordpress.com\/2008\/09\/29\/momservations-ii"},"modified":"2008-09-29T11:48:07","modified_gmt":"2008-09-29T11:48:07","slug":"momservations-ii","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/momservations.com\/index.php\/2008\/09\/29\/momservations-ii\/","title":{"rendered":"Momservations II"},"content":{"rendered":"<p class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin:0;\"><font face=\"Times New Roman\" size=\"4\"><em>Back by popular demand&hellip;<\/em><\/font><\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin:0;\"><font face=\"Times New Roman\" size=\"4\">&nbsp;<\/font><\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin:0;\"><font face=\"Times New Roman\" size=\"4\">It is inevitable that you will become an underwear sniffer in an effort to do less laundry.<\/font><\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin:0;\"><font face=\"Times New Roman\" size=\"4\">&nbsp;<\/font><\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin:0;\"><font face=\"Times New Roman\" size=\"4\">You will never be able to get your kids to actually put their clean and dirty clothes where they belong if they ever catch you doing the sniff test, because it is more fun to declare to everyone that Mommy is an underwear sniffer.<\/font><\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin:0;\"><font face=\"Times New Roman\" size=\"4\">&nbsp;<\/font><\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin:0;\"><font face=\"Times New Roman\" size=\"4\">Daddy going out of town usually coincides with Breakfast for Dinner on the menu.<\/font><\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin:0;\"><font face=\"Times New Roman\" size=\"4\">&nbsp;<\/font><\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin:0;\"><font face=\"Times New Roman\" size=\"4\">Mommy going out of town means McDonald&rsquo;s is on the menu. For breakfast, lunch and dinner.<\/font><\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin:0;\"><font face=\"Times New Roman\" size=\"4\">&nbsp;<\/font><\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin:0;\"><font face=\"Times New Roman\" size=\"4\">She who goes to bed with dishes in the sink wakes up with ants on the counter.<\/font><\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin:0;\"><font face=\"Times New Roman\" size=\"4\">&nbsp;<\/font><\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin:0;\"><font face=\"Times New Roman\" size=\"4\">Baby wipes are surprisingly useful to take off make-up, get crayon art off the wall and wipe down a bathroom prior to an unexpected guest.<\/font><\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin:0;\"><font face=\"Times New Roman\" size=\"4\">&nbsp;<\/font><\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin:0;\"><font face=\"Times New Roman\" size=\"4\">Shout stain remover is a gift from God.<\/font><\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin:0;\"><font face=\"Times New Roman\" size=\"4\">&nbsp;<\/font><\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin:0;\"><font face=\"Times New Roman\" size=\"4\">There are no such things as friends and respecting the elderly when it comes to getting the front row at your child&rsquo;s school play or talent show night.<\/font><\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin:0;\"><font face=\"Times New Roman\" size=\"4\">&nbsp;<\/font><\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin:0;\"><font face=\"Times New Roman\" size=\"4\">No one ever learns to like Brussel sprouts or lima beans.<\/font><\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin:0;\"><font face=\"Times New Roman\" size=\"4\">&nbsp;<\/font><\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin:0;\"><font face=\"Times New Roman\" size=\"4\">The first time your baby sleeps through the night you will wake in a panic that they didn&rsquo;t wake you.<\/font><\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin:0;\"><font face=\"Times New Roman\" size=\"4\">&nbsp;<\/font><\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin:0;\"><font face=\"Times New Roman\" size=\"4\">You are not a mother if you have never caught throw-up in your hands, wiped snot without a tissue or sniffed a baby&rsquo;s bottom for poo-poo.<\/font><\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin:0;\"><font face=\"Times New Roman\" size=\"4\">&nbsp;<\/font><\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin:0;\"><font face=\"Times New Roman\" size=\"4\">Clean it and the mess will follow.<\/font><\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin:0;\"><font face=\"Times New Roman\" size=\"4\">&nbsp;<\/font><\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin:0;\"><font face=\"Times New Roman\" size=\"4\">There is no such thing as finished laundry.<\/font><\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin:0;\"><font face=\"Times New Roman\" size=\"4\">&nbsp;<\/font><\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin:0;\"><font face=\"Times New Roman\" size=\"4\">Telling your kids that monsters sleep under your bed and not theirs is not bad parenting, it&rsquo;s sleep preservation.<\/font><\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin:0;\"><font face=\"Times New Roman\" size=\"4\">&nbsp;<\/font><\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin:0;\"><font face=\"Times New Roman\" size=\"4\">Kisses and boo-boos go together like peanut butter and jelly.<\/font><\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin:0;\"><font face=\"Times New Roman\" size=\"4\">&nbsp;<\/font><\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin:0;\"><font face=\"Times New Roman\" size=\"4\">Air-bags were really invented by a mother to keep kids from fighting over the front seat.<\/font><\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin:0;\"><font face=\"Times New Roman\" size=\"4\">&nbsp;<\/font><\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin:0;\"><font face=\"Times New Roman\" size=\"4\">The&nbsp;Cartoon Network is a necessary evil.<\/font><\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"text-align:center;margin:0;\" align=\"center\"><font face=\"Times New Roman\" size=\"4\">?<span>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; <\/span>?<span>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; <\/span>?<\/font><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Back by popular demand&hellip; &nbsp; It is inevitable that you will become an underwear sniffer in an effort to do less laundry. &nbsp; You will&hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-9361","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.4 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Momservations II - Kelli M. 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