{"id":32044,"date":"2020-06-26T18:29:23","date_gmt":"2020-06-27T01:29:23","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.momservations.com\/?p=32044"},"modified":"2020-06-26T18:29:23","modified_gmt":"2020-06-27T01:29:23","slug":"whos-got-the-lucky-coronavirus-bingo-card","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/momservations.com\/index.php\/2020\/06\/26\/whos-got-the-lucky-coronavirus-bingo-card\/","title":{"rendered":"Who’s Got the Lucky Coronavirus Bingo Card?"},"content":{"rendered":"

Momservation: <\/strong>Being a parent means you\u2019re never surprised about anything anymore. Until Corona showed up. That bitch is crazy.<\/p>\n

☺\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 ☺\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 ☺<\/p>\n

It started with the Tiger King.<\/p>\n

Actually, let me back up. It started with the Coronavirus Pandemic. The unbelievable suddenly became believable when the world got collectively shut down and shut in because of a highly contagious killer virus.<\/p>\n

From there the hits kept coming.<\/p>\n

Calendars full of fun and exciting events got wiped out like a thunderstorm rolling through the Midwest.<\/p>\n

People were split in to two groups: Essential or Non-essential.<\/p>\n

Toilet paper became hoarded like Covid-19 was a dysentery disease.<\/p>\n

Schools shut down and parents became teachers and teachers became tech savvy video stars. The first week of homeschool kids were suspended for fighting and parent teachers were being fired for showing up drunk.<\/p>\n

Then everyone discovered Tiger King<\/a> on Netflix. And shit just got crazier from there.<\/p>\n

In fact, if you didn\u2019t have CAROLE BASKIN DID IT<\/a> as your FREE SPACE on your Coronavirus Bingo Card, then go ahead and put your dauber down\u2014you ain\u2019t winning.<\/p>\n

The Coronavirus Bingo Card<\/strong>: this has become my favorite thing to come out of this crazy Time of Coronavirus that we\u2019re living. I first saw people referring to it on Twitter trying to explain a string of crazy, unbelievable and downright \u201cAre you kidding me? What next?\u201d apocalyptic-type events that keep lining up like hurricanes in the Gulf of Mexico.<\/p>\n

As in: \u201cWell, I didn\u2019t have monkey gang war on my Coronavirus Bingo Card,\u201d when reports emerged in March of monkeys in Thailand fighting over food<\/a> due to lack of tourism.\"\"<\/p>\n

And it just kept getting weirder. Murder Hornets<\/a>. The U.S. admitting there\u2019s been UFO sightings<\/a>. Locust swarms.<\/p>\n

Makes you wonder what is on these Coronavirus Bingo Cards that we\u2019re all holding. Anyone have the president of the United States of America suggesting that injection of disinfectant might cure The Rona<\/a>? I didn\u2019t.<\/p>\n

You know what I did have on my Bingo Card? My kid getting The Rona. I just had the wrong one. With both of them in college and social distancing being more of a suggestion than a rule in the Pass the Wine Bag demographic, I figured it was only a matter of time. I thought my daughter would bring it home from Isla Vista, UCSB\u2019s little city that never stops partying. Turns out it was the kid at Boise State who caught it in quarantine<\/a>.<\/p>\n

Now as we move into our fourth month of sheltering in place for The Rona and a month of world-wide Black Lives Matter protests<\/a> with Civil War era statues falling<\/a> like Trump\u2019s poll numbers, I\u2019m wondering who has that lucky Bingo Card with the impossible becoming possible.<\/p>\n

Because I sure as hell don\u2019t have Massive Saharan Dust Storm<\/a> that is now reaching U.S. shores on my Bingo Card.<\/p>\n

Adopting a sourdough starter and becoming a crazed sourdough lady\u2026Been in a social distance parade\u2026Kid gets The Rona at college\u2026Met an NBA player walking his dog in my neighborhood\u2026Think Carole Baskin did it\u2026BINGO!!!!<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

#CoronavirusBingoCard\u00a0\u00a0 #TruthIsStrangerThanFiction\u00a0\u00a0 #DidntSeeThatComing<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Truth is stranger than fiction in The Time of Corona<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":32046,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[2670],"tags":[2698,2699,2700,2701,2702,2703,2704,86,2705,5,2706,2707,2708,2709,2710,2711,2712,2713],"class_list":["post-32044","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-coronavirus","tag-apocalyptic-things-happening-during-coronavirus-pandemic","tag-carole-baskin","tag-civil-war-statues-removed","tag-coronavirus-bingo-card","tag-coronavirus-stories","tag-didnt-see-that-coming","tag-interactive-black-lives-matter-protest-map","tag-kelli-wheeler","tag-locust-swarms","tag-momservations","tag-monkey-gang-war","tag-murder-hornets","tag-my-kid-caught-covid-in-quarantine","tag-president-suggests-injecting-disinfectant","tag-saharan-dust-storm","tag-tiger-king","tag-truth-is-stranger-than-fiction","tag-ufo-sightings-declassified"],"yoast_head":"\nWho's Got the Lucky Coronavirus Bingo Card? - Kelli M. 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