{"id":18731,"date":"2017-09-14T11:53:08","date_gmt":"2017-09-14T18:53:08","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.momservations.com\/?p=18731"},"modified":"2017-09-14T11:53:08","modified_gmt":"2017-09-14T18:53:08","slug":"5-rules-of-marriage","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/momservations.com\/index.php\/2017\/09\/14\/5-rules-of-marriage\/","title":{"rendered":"5 Rules of Marriage"},"content":{"rendered":"

Momservation: \u201c<\/strong>We are gathered here today because two people who can survive a remodel can survive anything.\u201d Kelli Wheeler officiating the wedding of Nick & Annie Silveira<\/em><\/p>\n

\u263a\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u263a\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u263a<\/p>\n

\"\"I recently had the honor of being asked to officiate my cousin\u2019s wedding.<\/p>\n

It was an unbelievable experience that afterward had me giddy as kindergartener\u2019s first trip to Disneyland where they were finally big enough to ride all the rides. That 15 minutes standing up there marrying two people who mean so much to me, with their two darling children at their feet, left a sparkly imprint on my soul. It was, without a doubt, a thrill, a privilege, and forever a cherished memory. To paraphrase Ferris Bueller: It was so choice. If you ever have the opportunity, I highly recommend doing it.<\/p>\n

Nick and Annie asked me to marry them because according to Annie, \u201cNick and I admire and respect your marriage and the way you have raised your family. We would love to have someone whom we hold in such high regard to marry us.\u201d<\/p>\n

*Sniff* How could someone say no to that butter up? I think the only other words that have ever moved me as much as her request was hearing my husband say, \u201cHoney, you are right. I was wrong.\u201d<\/p>\n

Annie also asked me to open up the ceremony with \u201cYour own amazing speech about love, marriage, kids and Nick and I.\u201d<\/p>\n

No pressure or anything.<\/p>\n

But as a family columnist, public speaker, pretty well-liked and loved mother of a 17 year-old and 16 year-old, and happily married 21 years to the man I fell in love with 27 years ago, I felt up to the job and excited for the challenge.<\/p>\n

I\u2019m just going to go ahead and swallow all humility here and say\u2026I knocked it out of the park! Annie outdid herself\u2014the wedding and reception was magical, beautiful, and the perfect celebration of love, marriage and family. And I couldn\u2019t be prouder or happier to have done her vision justice with my ceremony.<\/p>\n

So many people came up to me after gushing about my speech and request for my 5 Rules of Marriage<\/strong> I imparted to Nick and Annie, that I\u2019ve decided to share it here by popular demand.<\/p>\n

I hope these words of wisdom below gained from 21 years of wedded compromise inspire more than just Nick & Annie\u2019s future together as husband, wife, mom and dad. I hope all who read them find a confirmation of or guide for their own happily ever after.<\/p>\n

5 Rules of Marriage<\/u><\/strong><\/h2>\n

By Kelli Wheeler<\/p>\n

Rule #1: First Respect Yourself \u2013 because if you don\u2019t, no one else will.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Be someone trustworthy. Be someone who helps others. Be someone who forgives and doesn\u2019t hold onto their anger and frustration like a lead balloon. Be someone loving, compassionate, and kind. Be someone you can look in the mirror and be proud of. Your spouse and your children deserve no less. They either chose you or are stuck with you so give them the best person you can be.<\/p>\n

Rule #2: Communicate.<\/strong><\/p>\n

You can\u2019t unring a bell so don\u2019t say something hurtful that you can\u2019t take back. It can never be stricken from the record so choose your words carefully. Take some time to calm down or collect your thoughts. Don\u2019t criticize and don\u2019t get defensive. Start with sentences that say: I\u2019m hurt\/angry\/disappointed\/frustrated because this is how I feel when you (eat the last Oreo and leave an empty package in the pantry.) Listen and let the other person talk without interrupting. And never sarcastically say the fighting words of: \u201cWell welcome to my world!\u201d<\/p>\n

Forever tell your wife she looks beautiful and forever tell your husband he looks handsome. Don\u2019t be stingy with \u201cI love you\u2019s\u201d or even the \u201cYou know, I still really like you after all these years.\u201d<\/p>\n

Rule #3: Make Time for Each Other<\/strong><\/p>\n

Remember the oxygen mask rule from flying: you can\u2019t save everyone if you don\u2019t save yourself first. Give each other \u201cMe Time\u201d but also invest in \u201cWe Time.\u201d You\u2019ll be better parents for it.<\/p>\n

With kids you will always be too tired. Don\u2019t wait until you\u2019re not too tired. You never will be. Hire a babysitter, call up G-Jay, or hit up Auntie Libby, and do a date night at least once a month. Never stop reminding yourselves why you fell in love.<\/p>\n

Rule #4: Never Leave a Man or Woman Behind\u00a0 <\/strong><\/p>\n

Don\u2019t go sleep in the other room. In 21 years Trey and I have never escaped or been banished to the couch. Happily ever after means you suffer through snoring, stinky farts, stolen covers, and cold shoulders. Intimacy is vital in a marriage and if you\u2019re in the other room you literally start putting walls between each other. So communicate, buy ear plugs, plug-in air-fresheners, and always kiss each other goodnight.<\/p>\n

Rule #5: Enjoy the journey<\/strong><\/p>\n

They ups, the downs, the days when the kids sleep in and the days when you are looking for their receipts to take them back. Celebrate each other\u2019s successes in the good times and be each other\u2019s rock in the hard times. We only go this way once so stop and play with your kids, laugh at the chaos, cry over peed beds and barf that missed the toilet, and smile and thank God because this is your life.\u00a0 And remember: Good parents have dirty cars, messy houses and happy children.<\/p>\n

#NickandAnnie2017<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

The secret to 21 years of wedded compromise.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":18732,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[2170],"tags":[2299,2300,2301,2,2302,2303,86,3,2304,5,2305,2306,1361,2307,2308],"class_list":["post-18731","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-inspirational","tag-5-rules-of-marriage","tag-best-wedding-ceremonies","tag-best-wedding-speeches","tag-family","tag-family-columnist","tag-ideas-for-wedding-ceremony","tag-kelli-wheeler","tag-kids","tag-marriage","tag-momservations","tag-nick-and-annie-wedding","tag-sample-wedding-ceremony","tag-teens","tag-wedding","tag-wedding-speech"],"yoast_head":"\n5 Rules of Marriage - Kelli M. 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