{"id":12253,"date":"2013-08-20T13:41:44","date_gmt":"2013-08-20T20:41:44","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/momservations.wordpress.com\/?p=12253"},"modified":"2013-08-20T13:41:44","modified_gmt":"2013-08-20T20:41:44","slug":"but-wait-theres-more","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/momservations.com\/index.php\/2013\/08\/20\/but-wait-theres-more\/","title":{"rendered":"But Wait! There’s More!"},"content":{"rendered":"

Momservation:<\/b> One of these years I\u2019m going to boycott emergency cards and just tell my kid: \u201cDon\u2019t get hurt.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u263a\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u263a\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u263a<\/b><\/p>\n

\"Beware<\/a>
Beware of what comes home in these backpacks after the first day of school…<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Why does going back to school require so much paperwork?<\/p>\n

I think I might just hate filling out Emergency Cards in triplicate more than Back to School shopping (which ranks right up there with PAP smears on my Yeah, Let Me Get Right On That list).<\/p>\n

As if my hand wasn\u2019t cramping up enough trying to get vital information in the allotted .05 centimeter space, there\u2019re more! PTA forms, volunteer forms, school roster forms, picture day forms, school lunch forms\u2026and they don\u2019t just want my information, they want my money!<\/p>\n

Just when you think you\u2019ve narrowly avoided applying for a second mortgage and disability for the carpal tunnel, the next wave of forms hits in the form of \u201chomework.\u201d<\/p>\n

That\u2019s right\u2014when the administration and the PTA are done working you over, they teachers get a shot at ya.<\/p>\n

They\u2019re smart too\u2014their requests come through your children who think because it\u2019s assigned as homework, their grade will go down if they don\u2019t do it. So you read all the classroom rules and expectations and you sign at the bottom that everyone\u2019s seen it and are all on the same page, but wait\u2014there\u2019s more!<\/p>\n

It\u2019s the requested \u201cdonation\u201d for art, science, literature, math, media, P.E., etc. to purchase supplemental supplies so your child won\u2019t be shafted like they were from the great state of California.<\/p>\n

Let\u2019s be honest here. This is not a donation. This is a shake down. Because what parent is not going to \u201cdonate\u201d to the cause of enriching their child\u2019s education\u2014but more importantly\u2014who\u2019s going to let their kid start off the school year with a big \u201c0\u201d and be the subject of classrooms snickers because you didn\u2019t do your \u201chomework\u201d?<\/p>\n

Well played teachers. Well played.<\/p>\n

So while I\u2019m icing my writing hand and cooling down my checkbook, I thought I would leave you with my ever-popular and often requested list of Momservations Top Ten Rules for Kids<\/i> <\/a>to go with the classroom rules for the new school year. I promise you won\u2019t have to sign that you read it\u2026<\/b><\/p>\n

Momservations\u00ae <\/strong><\/p>\n

Top Ten Rules for Kids<\/strong><\/p>\n

    \n
  1. Respect yourself and others. <\/b>This pretty much covers all other rules. But just to be clear\u2026<\/li>\n
  2. Own it. <\/b>Quit throwing other people under the bus and take responsibility for your choices.<\/li>\n
  3. Just \u2018cause you can, doesn\u2019t mean you should.<\/b> \u201cSeemed like a good idea at the time\u201d should be reserved for tombstones.<\/li>\n
  4. Lying only throws fuel on the fire. <\/b>Mess with the fire and you\u2019re going to get burned.<\/li>\n
  5. Change is inevitable. <\/b>So quit your complaining and learn to adapt. <\/b><\/li>\n
  6. Don\u2019t be a hater. <\/b>Ugly attitudes don\u2019t look good on anyone. Let it go – don\u2019t waste energy on carrying a grudge.<\/li>\n
  7. Remember the Mom Test. <\/b>If you wouldn\u2019t say it, do it, or suggest it with Mom standing next to you \u2013 think twice.<\/li>\n
  8. Do no harm. <\/b>Keep all hands, feet, arms, legs and other violations of space and privacy to yourself.<\/li>\n
  9. Do something. <\/b>Don\u2019t just sit there \u2013 be helpful, thoughtful, considerate, generous, a friend, anything! Everyone\u2019s got something to give.<\/li>\n
  10. Enjoy the journey. <\/b>It\u2019s not the destination that counts, but how you get there. So you might as well hang on end enjoy the ride.<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

    \n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

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