{"id":11541,"date":"2011-11-01T13:22:25","date_gmt":"2011-11-01T20:22:25","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/momservations.wordpress.com\/?p=11541"},"modified":"2011-11-01T13:22:25","modified_gmt":"2011-11-01T20:22:25","slug":"i-survived-chaperoning-outdoor-education-barely","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/momservations.com\/index.php\/2011\/11\/01\/i-survived-chaperoning-outdoor-education-barely\/","title":{"rendered":"I Survived Chaperoning Outdoor Education (Barely)"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><strong>Momservation:<\/strong> A chaperone on an overnight field trip is as good as CIA trained.<\/p>\n<p align=\"center\">\u263a\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u263a\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u263a<\/p>\n<figure id=\"attachment_11542\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-11542\" style=\"width: 300px\" class=\"wp-caption alignleft\"><a href=\"http:\/\/momservations.files.wordpress.com\/2011\/11\/402.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-11542\" title=\"402\" src=\"http:\/\/momservations.files.wordpress.com\/2011\/11\/402.jpg?w=300\" alt=\"\" width=\"300\" height=\"200\" \/><\/a><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-11542\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">Arden Middle School 6th graders at Sly Park<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<p>One hundred and sixty 6<sup>th<\/sup> graders.<\/p>\n<p>Twenty-four girls in my cabin.<\/p>\n<p>Five days and four nights in <a href=\"http:\/\/www.scoe.net\/slypark\/\">Sly Park<\/a>.<\/p>\n<p>One exhausted chaperone.<\/p>\n<p>It\u2019s possible I might have<a href=\"http:\/\/en.wikipedia.org\/wiki\/Posttraumatic_stress_disorder\"> Post Traumatic Stress Disorder<\/a>. I uncurled myself from the fetal position just long enough to write this and eat some Xanax like they were M&amp;M\u2019s. I turned down a Halloween party the night we got back and a Date Night to dinner and the movies with Hubby the next night. I stumbled through Halloween a shell of my former self randomly yelling, \u201cI said turn those lights off and be quiet!\u201d<\/p>\n<p>For those of you just joining our regularly scheduled program, I volunteered last week to chaperone my son\u2019s outdoor education field trip to <a href=\"http:\/\/www.scoe.net\/slypark\/\">Sly Park<\/a> because, unlike 95% of his 6<sup>th<\/sup> grade class, he actually wanted me there and wasn\u2019t embarrassed to be seen with me.<\/p>\n<p>It was non-stop supervision \u2013 making sure kids were where they were supposed to be around the clock and keeping them in line. 6:45 a.m. \u2013 time for breakfast cafeteria duty, 7:30 a.m. time for breakfast, trying to get kids in and out of showers in 20 minute windows, organize skit practice, now organize songs, 9 a.m. now it\u2019s time to go on a hike to the lake or to the planetarium, or the animal room or hike to the creek, who\u2019s got lunch duty? Where\u2019s Elizabeth? Has anyone seen Elizabeth? Who\u2019s crying? Again? What now? Okay, everyone be quiet so we can be excused to eat first, 1:30 p.m. let\u2019s get the groups together for afternoon hikes and activities, free time on the blacktop \u2013 but wait, they got back late so get them ready to go to dinner. No, no time for showers now, maybe before bed.<\/p>\n<figure id=\"attachment_11543\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-11543\" style=\"width: 300px\" class=\"wp-caption alignright\"><a href=\"http:\/\/momservations.files.wordpress.com\/2011\/11\/792.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-11543\" title=\"792\" src=\"http:\/\/momservations.files.wordpress.com\/2011\/11\/792.jpg?w=300\" alt=\"\" width=\"300\" height=\"200\" \/><\/a><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-11543\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">Me and my Black Oak girls cabin<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<p>Who\u2019s got telescope training? Who\u2019s going on the night hike? 6:30 p.m. finally, some down time \u2013 nope you need to go to a chaperone meeting or go help set up Carnival Night. 9:15 p.m., everyone 15 minutes until lights out \u2013 no time to shower, just brush your teeth. Who\u2019s still up? Who\u2019s got the light on? I said be quiet! Who\u2019s crying? No, you can\u2019t go home, go back to bed, it\u2019ll be okay. Who\u2019s flushing the toilet in the middle of the night? No I can\u2019t move your bunk, just put a pillow over your head to drown out the snoring. Time to get up \u2013 who\u2019s got breakfast duty?<\/p>\n<p>This is just a fraction of my day for five days.<\/p>\n<p>There were homesick kids crying every night. More boys than girls.<\/p>\n<p>And let me just tell you, it is a sight to behold, observing the wild 6<sup>th<\/sup> grader outside of their normal habitat engaged in the ritualistic dance for social dominance and desirability.<\/p>\n<p>There were clusters of girls whispering and giggling the 11 &amp; 12 year old mating call:<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI\u2019ll tell you who I like if you tell me who you like.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cOkay, but you can\u2019t tell anyone.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cOkay, I promise.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>And then later there would be dramatic tears, girls clustering the wounded girl, some feigning compassion simply to get close enough to collect gossip and spread it. \u201cWhat\u2019s wrong? What happened?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cShe told everyone I like him and now he knows!\u201d<\/p>\n<p><em>(Collective gasp and end of world as they know it.)<\/em><\/p>\n<figure id=\"attachment_11544\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-11544\" style=\"width: 200px\" class=\"wp-caption alignleft\"><a href=\"http:\/\/momservations.files.wordpress.com\/2011\/11\/529.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-11544\" title=\"529\" src=\"http:\/\/momservations.files.wordpress.com\/2011\/11\/529.jpg?w=200\" alt=\"\" width=\"200\" height=\"300\" \/><\/a><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-11544\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">My son, Logan, on kitchen duty<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<p>The boys would be walking on the trail, kicking rocks discussing cute factor like baseball stats.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cDo you think she\u2019s hot?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cNo. Do you?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cHe thinks she\u2019s hot.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cShe\u2019s okay. She was hotter last year.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYeah, I guess you\u2019re right. What do you think is for lunch today?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Truly, I did have a good time and enjoy bearing witness and being a part of a trip these kids will remember and talk about forever. My son had a blast, as did most of the kids and my girls\u2019 cabin was great \u2013 we had a lot of fun together. It was just simply exhausting.<\/p>\n<p>My daughter will be in 6<sup>th<\/sup> grade next year \u2013 it just might take a full year for me to recover enough to consider doing it again two years in a row.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Moms spends 5 days in Sly Park chaperoning an overnight field trip and lives to tell about it.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[165],"tags":[570,576,2,86,3,5,573,6,28,577,574],"class_list":["post-11541","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-parenting-humor-2","tag-6th-grade-field-trips","tag-chaperoning-overnight-field-trips","tag-family","tag-kelli-wheeler","tag-kids","tag-momservations","tag-outdoor-education","tag-parenting","tag-parenting-humor","tag-post-traumatic-stress-disorder","tag-sly-park"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.4 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>I Survived Chaperoning Outdoor Education (Barely) - Kelli M. 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